I don't like making to do lists.

I'm so not one of those type "A" personalities. Not that I'm a lazy slob or that I'm not a hard worker or dedicate myself to a task or that I try to finish things that I start. I just really, really hate making lists for what I plan on doing for the day. I feel like it goes against every part of who I am.

Why should I make an attempt to plan out every single aspect of my day when the slightest thing could throw off a schedule? Not to say that it's not good to have a semblence of a plan in mind, just that I don't want to end up as a hyper-controlling person. I've felt the pressure of trying to get things done on time and felt disorganized when I have something that is due or something that needs to be done in a certain order, but I'm more one of those people who has a cluttered desk and knows where it all is types.

I've seen people I know personally act is if the whole day is a wash if one thing goes wrong, something is done out of order, or something doesn't go according to how they expect people to act.

That said, I find myself having to do minor list making in order to get things done lately. I hate it. A lot. There are people who say, "Doesn't it feel better to get things crossed off your list for the day? Don't you feel accomplished?" To that I say, "But I feel even better when I take that little list and throw it away." I know in some cases I wouldn't have gotten through college if I hadn't buckled down and done a bit of organizing, but I have to say, those were some of the most stressful days I've ever had. Not just because of the copious amounts of work I had to do in order to get everything done, but rather I tried to set a pace for myself that I thought was what was the "responsible thing" to do. Again, not that I shirk at the notion of responsibility, but why should I do what I think of as what other people consider responsible? What's the point in going to extreme lengths to please a person who will never know what you did in the first place? Ultimately, some of them don't care how you did it, just that you did it, period.

Now, that is, of course a broad generalization. For example, if my last minute idea to pay the bills was to rob a bank, a whole heckuva a lot of people would care how I went about things. The big things are not really what I'm rambling about here.

What am I saying then?

I hate list making! Didn't I say that in the title??? Geez...